AnneLyze

As many of you know I had a hysterectomy on 8/24/09. It was so hard, much harder than I thought it would be. I was so sure it would be no big deal and that's what I told everyone. For the first time in many, many years I found myself wanting my mother. I wanted someone other than my sons to take care of me. For just a little bit, I wanted someone else to be in charge and just be cared for. The morning of the surgery, after all the diarrhea and vomitting during the night, I was in a panic. I had to get it together. I took a xanax and pulled myself up. I couldn't show Sam how scared and upset I was and I didn't want anyone else to know. It was my boss doing the surgery. I got dressed and put on a necklace that a patient had given me. It was a cross and she had it blessed by the bishop before giving it to me. It made me feel better knowing that someone cared enough about me to get it blessed. For a brief moment itr was like having a mother with me. I was strong,...

My best friend in High School died last Friday. She had a massive heart attack. Her ex husband called to tell me the news and graciously invite me to her wake and funeral. Ironically I had been thinking of her on Friday. Sidney was a wonderful person and friend and I was blessed to have known her. Sidney had four kids, Rebecca, Jacob, Daniel and Sarah. We once joked that for two non religious people we sure did pick biblical names for our children. I don't remember how we met. We were both transplants from other schools and therefore didn't have the huge circle of friends everyone else had. I don't remember how we got to be friends either. We really didn't have much in common. She was so smart and liked to learn. Sidney was in honors classes. Though I consider myself smart, I didn't like school and didn't try very hard. She actually read the required books, understood them and liked them. She graduated at the top of our class. I was somewhere in t...